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Denim “Homophone” Gansey: Week 8 – 20 December

And here we are, the Mrs Laider/Mrs Laidlaw gansey finished just in time for Christmas. I don’t really have much to say other than that I’m really pleased with it, and it just goes to show how creative you can be in combining patterns and still be confident that the end result will look stunning. And what a great colour Frangipani Denim is, and how well it always seems to show the patterns to their best effect. Next week, a one-off project that has me smirking with quiet satisfaction.

I had my neck scan in Inverness this week. The good news is that the lumps the surgeons spotted last week appear to be perfectly normal lymphy-type things. The bad news? Well, stop me if you’ve heard this before, but while she was looking the doctor discovered a hitherto-unsuspected growth on my thyroid. These are usually benign, she said, but she just wanted to take a sample to get it checked out. That was when my day, which till then was up there with the last act of Singin’ in the Rain in terms of happy endings, suddenly turned into something even Thomas Hardy might have rejected as too gloomy.

Christmas Decoration Bombing

The scan itself was a breeze, though the sensation of the scanner sliding over my neck on its film of cold jelly put me in mind of princess Leia being slobbered over by Jabba the Hutt in Return of the Jedi (I was wondering why they made me wear that gold bikini instead of the more usual hospital gown), or possibly someone about to be devoured by a many-tentacled horror from the abyss. Then the doctor produced the needle… and, look, if you’re at all squeamish you might want to skip the rest, enjoy the pictures, and rejoin us next week.

Still with me? Well, don’t say you weren’t warned. The needle went in at the base of my throat, and only hurt a little thanks to a local anaesthetic. The initial probe for a sample lasted a minute or so and then the needle was withdrawn, and I thought, well, really that wasn’t so bad. Ha! Turned out she was finding it difficult to reach the right spot, and had to try again. This time it lasted several minutes, and I was aware of both a mounting pain and pressure in my breast (possibly, taking her cue from the dwarves in The Lord of the Rings, she delved too greedily and too deep). I started feeling anxious, then remote, then I blacked out.

Hawthorn & St Fergus’

When I came to I was on my side, surrounded by concerned medical staff. Apparently the needle had touched a nerve (literally: the vagus nerve to be precise). I’d had something of a seizure (gone rigid and bit my lip so my mouth was bleeding) and fainted. I was sweating so much it soaked through my clothes, the bed, the floor and several floors beneath, prompting an investigation in the basement into burst pipes. I felt woozy and weak, and was sick at regular intervals for the next two and a half hours, by which time the novelty had definitely worn off. I was finally allowed to leave around 4.00pm, pumped full of anti-dizziness and -nausea drugs; given that I’d turned up at 10.30am for a 30-minute appointment, I pretty much felt I’d had my money’s worth. Oh yes, and the icing on the cake? The doctor who checked me over cheerfully opined that I had Menieres disease, which I must say didn’t improve my mood as much as he may have hoped.

Sunset at Loch Watten

But really, what does it matter? The trauma’s already fading, the bruises are too, and I can go into the new year with cautious optimism and only a biopsy or two to worry about. So now let Margaret and me wish all our readers a very safe and happy Christmas, and especially all those health care professionals who’ve kept services going so heroically over the last couple of years. See you next time, and happy knitting!

16 comments to Denim “Homophone” Gansey: Week 8 – 20 December

  • Dave

    Not like you to turn up the opportunity to mention Alien Gordon…

  • Gordon

    Hi Dave, I’ve used that gag before! And we artistes are always striving for originality… not that we succeed very often…

  • Judit Mäkinen

    Dear Gordon and Margaret, Merry Christmas and many thanks for this year – it was a special year of knitting ! See You in 2022.

  • And a happy Christmas to you too Gordon. So sorry it went pear shaped, but you’ve come out the other end of it now. Similar happened to me during a breast biopsy. When they put everything down on the trolley I thought, thank G that’s done, but no, sorry Mrs B we’re struggling to get it,” we’ll have another go. Ha HA HA – Oh Shit!
    The golden rule is:- When in doubt, KNIT

  • Julie

    Have a happy, healthy Christmas Gordon and Margaret and may 2022 be good to you and your devoted readers.

  • Deb

    Aargh. Double aargh. Here’s to a generally Better New Year, eh. 👍 Deb

  • Gordon

    Cheers Deb – though I keep hearing Paul McCartney in my head singing, “I’ve got to admit, it’s getting better, a little better all the time”, and John Lennon cynically adding, “It can’t get no worse…”! 😀

  • REBECCA WHEELER

    I’ve been thinking about you all week, hoping you’d get good news. That’s quite a
    story. I also get sick every time I have anesthesia, almost as bad as the procedure.
    Your sweater is beautiful as always. In photographing my own knitting, I realized how
    perfect your stitches are – my mistakes easily visible. Wishing you both, the
    Merriest of Holidays. Love the sunset – beautiful. Relax, Kick back, Be easy.with
    yourselves.

    • Gordon

      Thanks Rebecca, that’s very kind of you. My stitches always look better after blocking, plus the scale is fine enough that they don’t show up from afar, much like you can’t see the flaws in the Great Wall of China from space…
      Happy Christmas!

  • =Tamar

    Urk. Vagus nerve issues are nasty. Fortunately, thyroid stuff is fairly routine and so far supplemental thyroid is affordable even here in the USA. Still, best wishes for another ‘no problems’ result.
    The gansey is beautiful!
    And from the pictures we’ve seen so far, you would look great in a gold bikini. Just saying.

  • Gordon

    Thank you Tamar. And as for pictures of me in a bikini, gold or otherwise, well, you’ll just have to wait till we launch our “premium” subscription service sometime in the future, when you can pay extra just so as to avoid those kinds of pictures…

  • Lois

    Wishing you and Margaret a very happy Christmas. And hopes for a better year ahead for all of us.

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